CHAPTER XXVIII
"And now, most noble Baron," said the illustrious Hilaro Frosticos,
"now is the time to make this people proceed in any business that we
find convenient. Take them at this present ferment of the mind, let
them not think, but at once set them to work." In short, the whole
nation went heartily to the business, to build an edifice such as was
never seen in any other country. I took care to supply them with their
favourite kava and fudge, and they worked like horses. The tower of
Babylon, which, according to Hermogastricus, was seven miles high, or
the Chinese wall, was a mere trifle, in comparison to this stupendous
edifice, which was completed in a very short space of time.
It was of an immense height, far beyond anything that ever had been
before erected, and of such gentle ascent, that a regiment of cavalry
with a train of cannon could ascend with perfect ease and facility. It
seemed like a rainbow in the heavens, the base of which appeared to
rise in the centre of Africa, and the other extremity seemed to stoop
into great Britain. A most noble bridge indeed, and a piece of masonry
that has outdone Sir Christopher Wren. Wonderful must it have been to
form so tremendous an arch, especially as the artists had certain
difficulties to labour against which they could not have in the
formation of any other arch in the world--I mean, the attraction of
the moon and planets: Because the arch was of so great a height, and
in some parts so elongated from the earth, as in a great measure to
diminish in its gravitation to the centre of our globe; or rather,
seemed more easily operated upon by the attraction of the planets: So
that the stones of the arch, one would think, at certain times, were
ready to fall /up/ to the moon, and at other times to fall down to the
earth. But as the former was more to be dreaded, I secured stability
to the fabric by a very curious contrivance: I ordered the architects
to get the heads of some hundred numbskulls and blockheads, and fix
them to the interior surface of the arch, at certain intervals, all
the whole length, by which means the arch was held together firm, and
its inclination to the earth eternally established; because of all the
things in the world, the skulls of these kind of animals have a
strange facility of tending to the centre of the earth.
The building being completed, I caused an inscription to be engraved
in the most magnificent style upon the summit of the arch, in letters
so great and luminous, that all vessels sailing to the East or West
Indies might read them distinct in the heavens, like the motto of
Constantine.
KARDOL BAGARLAN KAI TON FARINGO SARGAI RA
MO PASHROL VATINEAC CAL COLNITOS RO NA FILNAT
AGASTRA SA DINGANNAL FANO.
That is to say, "As long as this arch and bond of union shall exist,
so long shall the people be happy. Nor can all the power of the world
affect them, unless the moon, advancing from her usual sphere, should
so much attract the skulls as to cause a sudden elevation, on which
the whole will fall into the most horrible confusion."
An easy intercourse being thus established between Great Britain and
the centre of Africa, numbers travelled continually to and from both
countries, and at my request mail coaches were ordered to run on the
bridge between both empires. After some time, having settled the
government to my satisfaction, I requested permission to resign, as a
great cabal had been excited against me in England; I therefore
received my letters of recall, and prepared to return to Old England.
In fine, I set out upon my journey, covered with applause and general
admiration. I proceeded with the same retinue that I had before--
Sphinx, Gog and Magog, &c., and advanced along the bridge, lined on
each side with rows of trees, adorned with festoons of various
flowers, and illuminated with coloured lights. We advanced at a great
rate along the bridge, which was so very extensive that we could
scarcely perceive the ascent, but proceeded insensibly until we
arrived on the centre of the arch. The view from thence was glorious
beyond conception; 'twas divine to look down on the kingdoms and seas
and islands under us. Africa seemed in general of a tawny brownish
colour, burned up by the sun: Spain seemed more inclining to a yellow,
on account of some fields of corn scattered over the kingdom; France
appeared more inclining to a bright straw-colour, intermixed with
green; and England appeared covered with the most beautiful verdure. I
admired the appearance of the Baltic Sea, which evidently seemed to
have been introduced between those countries by the sudden splitting
of the land, and that originally Sweden was united to the western
coast of Denmark; in short, the whole interstice of the Gulf of
Finland had no being, until these countries, by mutual consent,
separated from one another. Such were my philosophical meditations as
I advanced, when I observed a man in armour with a tremendous spear or
lance, and mounted upon a steed, advancing against me. I soon
discovered by a telescope that it could be no other than Don Quixote,
and promised myself much amusement in the rencounter.
